Monthly Archives: February 2015

Why I give a damn about same-sex marriage

At work the other day, I overheard an interesting conversation between two co-workers talking about Alabama becoming the 37th State to allow same-sex marriage and the repercussions of some probate judges refusing to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples.

First off, I want to preface this discussion with a bit of information: these two gentleman (as far as I know) are not gay, they’re in their early-to-mid twenties, and they’re NERDtastic (nothing wrong with it, but they’re the kind of nerds that make me gag on a Superman figurine from their NERDknowledge).

Nerd #1 I will call Ozzy, with his long locks of blond hair (that Thor would be jealous of) done up by an American Flag bandana including those cute round spectacles that everyone went to Burger King for from Will Smith’s Wild, Wild West. Nerd #2 we will call Russell because, even though he isn’t Chinese (he’s Latino), he reminds me of the cute Scout from Disney’s UP.

The Nerdtastic Duo

The Nerdtastic Duo

Ozzy sits across from Russell and Russell sits next to me. After reading a news article, Ozzy stands up and tells Russell everything about Alabama. Then, he states, “This is why we need to eliminate marriage licenses altogether and the government needs to stay out of our bedrooms.”

“Except,” I interjected, “this would leave us to the state’s discretion and we just tried doing that and homosexuals didn’t receive their constitutional rights as US citizens. The rights of the minority cannot be left in the hands of the majority. Besides, marriages are the best contractual entity that’s recognized by the government that helps protect us as a couple, including property rights.”

Suddenly, Ozzy puffs up like a big toad and states in his Libertarian tone that he learned from Ron Paul: “Marriage licenses don’t have anything to do with pre-nuptials.”

"I use big words I don't understand in hopes of you not understanding them yourself.

“I use big words I don’t understand in hopes of you not understanding them yourself.”

I sighed heavily in hopes of keeping the aneurysm in my brain (fueled by Ozzy’s stupidity) from killing me. “Pre-nuptials are created to protect each other’s property from one another when separating. You’re referring to a will. A will allows one’s property to be given out to members of the family based on the deceased’s wants. But, if you take a look at history, it costs way too much for couples to create an ironclad will in hopes of not being thrown out by the court or a bigoted, ignorant judge who doesn’t like homosexuals. Again, the best contractual entity to be recognized by the government would be a marriage license. Why destroy an institution that’s working perfectly fine instead of just adding missing members of the cause?”

*Crickets*

There’s a reason why we’re fighting for marriage, and it has nothing to do with destroying family ideals. We are members of families. We’re human beings with mothers, brothers, sisters, fathers, cousins, nephews, nieces, and the like. We aren’t trying to recreate a mold of the family, but we want to create our own families. The only way to protect our families is to be recognized by the government as a family unit.

Marriage does this.

If you have any questions, please look up the book ‘Why You Should Give a Damn About Gay Marriage’. It explains everything you need to know about why marriage matters to gay people.